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Enjoy another wonderful text by Rev. Phil Smedsted, minister Emeritus of Oasis Rising Center

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Phil Smedstad's texts are one of the ways Oasis Rising Center supports members.

A Positive Path for Spiritual Living

Oasis Rising Center Spiritual Center
Oasis Rising Center 8125 West Sahara Avenue
Las Vegas, NV 89125
(702) 804-8189
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“The Victory of Surrender” 

By Rev. Phillip Smedstad

At one time, I thought that surrender to God meant giving up the life I wanted to live – giving up fun!  Now I know that all God/Spirit wants for us is happiness, abundance, fulfillment, and peace.  As our inner Parent, God wants for us exactly what we want for our children, which is to have the best life they can.

The lesson this past Sunday was based on the story of Saul’s conversion to the Apostle Paul.  If you want to read the story in the Bible, you can find it in Acts 9.

This is one of the major stories of transformation in the Bible.  Elsewhere Paul says, “Be you therefore transformed by the renewing of your mind.”  To renew something means to make it new again.  When our minds were new, we were teachable and open.  Also, we hadn’t yet made mistaken decisions about ourselves, others, and life.

Saul had been educated in the best schools.  He had studied Judaism and Greek philosophy.  He was a rabbi, a Pharisee, and a Roman citizen.  Paul held a high position in Hebrew society.  He was an aggressive young man who was going places.

Paul was a lot like me when I was in my 30’s.  By the time I was 35, I had been the minister of two large churches, and I was the Chairman of a powerful national Unity committee.

Outer success was very important to me.  I thought that “success in the world” (which in my field meant being the minister of a large church) would make me happy.  However, as successful as I was, I still wasn’t happy.  I felt empty inside; I had little love for myself; I lived for the approval of others; and I was very judgmental.

The turning point for me was a visit to the largest New Thought church in the world.  The minister spoke to some 3,500 people each Sunday.  As I looked at her, the thought occurred to me:  “If I don’t love and validate myself, there aren’t enough people on the planet to make me feel good about myself.”  It was the beginning of my deep transformation.

In the story, Saul was dedicated to the purity of Jewish law and to wiping out the upstart cult called “the followers of the way.”  Then, one day, on his way to Damascus he had a life-changing experience.  (Damascus was a center of commerce, and thus represents outer success.)
Saul was ruminating on the meaning of life. 

Perhaps he was thinking thoughts like, “I’ve done so well.  Why do I feel so bad?”  Then suddenly, there was a blazing light from Heaven.  (Where is Heaven?  Exactly.  Right within us.)
Saul heard a voice within him say, “Why do you persecute me?”  Saul said to the voice, “Who are you?”  The voice said, “I am Jesus of Nazareth.”  Suddenly Saul “got it.”  Jesus’ teachings of love and forgiveness were the route to happiness. This light was so bright that Saul was struck blind.  That is, his whole way of looking at life was gone.  Until then, as a Pharisee, he had believed that the route to God was through the purity of the law.  Saul taught and believed, “Be you therefore pure, as God is pure.”  Jesus, however, didn’t teach this.  Instead, he taught, “Be you therefore all-inclusive, even as your Father in Heaven is all-inclusive.

My own transformation process was about making my mind new again.  I had to learn that judgments (critical thoughts) are not a source of wisdom.  They are a source of pain.  As I let them go, I, too, felt blind for a time.  I’d relied on my judgmental mind to be a kind of compass – a way to tell right from wrong.

In the story, Saul went to Damascus, and there met someone named Ananias.  Ananias had received guidance telling him to minister unto Saul.  When he received this guidance, Ananias said to his guidance words to the effect of, “Are you crazy?  This man is killing my friends and no doubt wants to kill me.”

Still, he trusted his guidance.  He went to Saul and extended love to him.  As he did, he showed Saul a new way to live.  This was a way of life based on:

• Loving everyone, including one’s enemies.  (Be all-inclusive)
• The practice of forgiveness of everyone, even murderers like Saul.
• Following one’s guidance, even when it seemed crazy.
• And living a life of service and compassion.

Seeing Ananias’ example, “The scales fell away from Saul’s eyes” and he began to see with a new kind of vision.  The same thing happened to me.  I began to see through eyes of love and compassion instead of through eyes of fear, judgment, and control.

So Saul became Paul, a champion of this new way of life.  A fascinating part of the story is the meaning of the names “Saul” and “Paul.”
The word “Saul” means “getting what you want.”  And he did get what he wanted:  Power, prestige, a high position, and much more.  What he didn’t get was happiness.

The word “Paul” means “little, made small.”  This has to do with “who’s in charge of my life?”  Do I believe that I am in charge or that Spirit is in charge?

At this point, Saul became Paul as he went from being “will-ful” to being “will-ing.”  He goes from believing, “My intellect, my judgments, and my past are all sources of wisdom,” to accepting, “What will really make me happy is to surrender to God’s guidance and to extend love to all.”

If you are at a point in life where you are ready to give up your “Saul” consciousness, with its beliefs that “If I can just have enough outer success, I’ll be happy,” and, “I just have to get better at managing my life,” then I invite you to join me in surrendering to God every day.

Paul said later, “I die daily.”  I do too.  I die daily to being in control of my life.  I choose each day to ask for and follow my guidance.  If you are ready for this step, I can tell you from very personal experience that surrender doesn’t mean defeat.  It means victory.